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Today, in July ofwe have more than 2, members from around the world, including men and women of all ages.
Overwhelmingly, our discussions take place online, but individual members from several countries have arranged to meet in person, with more such meetings in the works. You can read my Community of Single People CoSP updates, as well as the original post introducing the group, here.
Others, though, are more ambivalent about their single lives. Still others are coupled and stop by to Friends community dating, first-hand, what single people have to say about their lives. Journalists, for example, sometimes ask for permission to query members for stories they are writing. More than 2, members, and most are participating: As of July 8,the Community of Single People has 2, members.
Nearly two-thirds of them Women and men: Most members, 74 percent, are women. But there are hundreds of Friends community dating, tooto be exactas well as 23 who do not identify as either female or male. Around the world: 61 percent of the members come from the United States. Others come from many places around the globe. As we have from the beginning, we continue to discuss just about every aspect of single life.
We share our triumphs and our fears, our good experiences and our not-so-good ones. We ask for advice. We compare notes on matters that have special resonance for single people for example, what do you do when hospitals insist that you have someone to drive you home after a medical procedure? We cheer each other on and encourage us all to celebrate the occasions and accomplishments that we care about the most. We post links to articles, books, TV shows, movies, memesand lyrics we love and ones we hate —and mock them when they perpetuate demeaning stereotypes of single people.
The quip posted most often this year was:. The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk. An average of nearly 14 new thre are started each day. The post that drew the most comments in the past month asked people why they ed the community. The post that generated the next most active discussion asked people what they thought about owning a home. I told the community members that I was going to write a third anniversary blog post and invited them to submit any comments they would like to share.
I love it that most comments are measured, considered, and people have so many fascinating experiences of their own, good, and bad, to share. I actually find most of the comments smart. It's really helped me form a positive view about being single.
I wish there'd been something like this years ago. I've learnt a lot and felt very supported. When I invited members to share their experiences for this blog post, no one said anything negative. Friends community dating complaints do get posted in the community. There seem to be two main. First, this is a group in which discussions of singlism — the stereotyping, stigmatizing, marginalizing, and discrimination against single people — are most welcome. Some community members dislike those discussions.
Second, and more worrisome to me, some people end up feeling insulted or demeaned by some of the discussions. Sometimes that happens when whole of people get derogated. I want us to be about standing up for people who are single, and living our lives fully, joyfully, and unapologetically, and not about demonizing people who are not single. Debunking studies claiming that married people are better than single people is something I do all the time; I consider that myth-busting rather than marriage -bashing.
Other times, people feel that others have responded to them too harshly. That pains me every time it happens. It is also a reminder to be more careful myself. Although nearly all of our discussions are online and we have never organized an official in-person CoSP meeting, more and more community members have been getting together in person.
Some CoSP members have developed friendships with each other. The Community of Single People was once a little group with a few hundred members that hardly anyone knew about. We are still reasonably small, at just over 2, which is probably good for our conversations. And we are still relatively unknown. For a sneak preview of what she said, take a look at this blog post. A pre-publication version of an academic book also includes a discussion of this community. I started another Facebook group this year, Fairness for Single People.
It is an initiative for calling out fair and unfair practices in businesses and other contexts. There is some overlap in the membership, and in the concerns, of the Fairness group and CoSP. The Fairness group has already gotten a nice shout-out from GirlBoss. Because many of us in CoSP use social media, we tried to come up with a hashtag to append Friends community dating relevant tweets and such. The result was BadassSingles. CoSP member Adriana Kohkemper generously donated her time and creative talents Friends community dating generating a whole series of possible images to use with the BadassSingles hashtag.
The image that illustrates this post is the one that got the most votes. The Community of Single People is a closed community, which means you need to apply to. There are only a few administrators, so it could take a few days to hear back. If you are thinking of ing to find a date, you will not be admitted. This is a special online place where talking about single life means talking about everything except dating. I love the community, and many others do, too. It is not for everyone, and some have ed and then left. To everyone who has ed and contributed, or just enjoyed the lurking — thank you.
Bella DePaulo, Ph. Ego and self-serving biases shape the life story we share with the world—and with ourselves. The good news: An internal reckoning will help us better comprehend who we truly are. Bella DePaulo Ph. Living Single.
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